Time passes and nothing happens.
I have spoken to many of late. Baradar over his concerns for the saftey of his wife. Seaver over the situation he is in and the fate of both himself and his baby brother. Even that narcissitic bigot of an elf has reared his head - and my ire.
Of the matter closest to my heart, however, there has been no word. I saw Davick many days ago now. I told him of my meeting with Marinette. What else was I to do? He needed to know. He had the right to know.
He asked me all that I could tell of her, and much of it I did. I did not mention that she had changed the subject whenever I spoke of him, nor that she seemed unconcerned over seeing him again. I could not tell him that.
As I expected, as I had wanted, he left my company to seek her out. After so long, I knew that he would wish to see her. After so long, I know that I would have done the same in his place. Still, I cannot say that it did not cause me pain. I cannot say that that I did not regret his departure. I cannot say that I do not fear the outcome of his meeting with her.
Time passes and nothing happens.
I feel like I stand in the middle of a crossroad, unable to proceed. Both of the paths ahead are barred to me for the moment and I linger here, uncertain as I wait for one of the ways to open. It is a terrible feeling to be so static and yet I am torn.
I wish this to be over. I wish to go on with my life, in whichever direction that may lie. However, I dread learning that my hearts desire will never be mine to hold.
