April. A new month. And with a new month comes a new outlook.
These past few days…. Have been hard. My feelings for Miss Brynleigh have nearly been my undoing.
I’ve spent most of my time in my house and my yard, making things. And every time I step out my front door, I am confronted by a boat. A boat left unfinished, made for one purpose, and one purpose only. And it seems… That all along, I’ve been missing that purpose. A boat is to keep oneself afloat amidst water that would otherwise come up over your head and drown you. And for these past few days, I have been drowning.
I haven’t seen another’s face since the market on the First. I’ve spent 48 hours in solitude, trying to figure things out, and I think I have.
I don’t know if I will ever be able to love her the way I want to. I don’t know she’ll ever let me, let alone reciprocate. But I can’t keep clinging to the hope that maybe someday I can.
So, I’m going to let her go. And I’m going to finish the boat, regardless. Because I need to keep myself afloat. And then…only then…can I save her from drowning too.
