Protect your heart she said, but what good is having one if it is tied up in chains and locked away in a box? Jack took me to the village store, and on the way back I stumbled and he caught me, tried to kiss me. He is handsome, cheeky, makes many a lass swoon, but I felt nothing. It were like having a brother try to kiss me, it were strange and odd and I couldn't. I don't feel that way about him, besides, he has a baby on the way with a lass on some farm somewhere. For all I know he has a few more elsewhere. He said sorry, so did I though I don't really know why, maybe because I knew he wanted it and I didnt?
Elias, he be beautiful, strange, and he came to my home with new clothes on him and wine in his hand. We talked, we talked so, so much. It were not as painful as I thought it might be. It were honest, raw and went well into the night, and we kissed. Don't think either of us could have stopped what would have happened if we'd have kept going, but sense kicked in. Well, I say that, it didn't really as next thing I know, Missus Denton is telling me how he were stinking drunk in an inn. Seems that were my fault in a way. He's sweet, lovely, and everything is new, but I swear he got lessons somewhere because his kisses be like none I've ever had and his touch makes me weak.
He's asked me to go away with him, on a journey with another cheeky sort and his lady. I never kept company with sellswords, though Pa needed them one time when folk were trying to raid the barn of ale. He seemed nice though and be good for a laugh. Milking hobbits of venom! I swear if my legs weren't crossed tight I would have wet meself right there and then! I can't believe Elias would be believing the man when he said the hobbits were poisonous! I think this journey will be full of amusing times.
We're trying again, it feels different this time. Maybe we understand each other a bit better now. I don't know what Ma and Pa will say, right now, I don't care. We talked about children too, how Pa wants to pass the brewery down to me, Elias wanting a child to pass all his teachings onto. I swear my suggestion of them making medicinal beer is the way to go, for most folk in these parts drink beer, why, they'd be as healthy as can be for it!
Poor Mister Maddoct, he must have thought himself going mad for the talk we shared this eve. Lightning fish, milking bulls, slug lass! I'll apologise next time I see him with a bottle of ale. I know he misses Mister Blid a great deal, it might cheer him a bit. I hope Mister Blid comes back soon, I think he needs him, especially with me and Elias being so daft.
I already miss him, I hope he rests well
