This is getting ridiculous.
Drevorin asks for - no, demands - my trust and yet he shows me none in return.
He promised that there would be no more spying, that he would prevent the woman Rosabur from watching me and listening in on my conversations and that he would send no one else to do it again. However, he was sighted, along with her, lurking behind a wall spying on a conversation between Davick and I!
I cannot begin to describe how annoyed this makes me. Was it a lie, or is it a broken promise? Does it matter either way? The end result remains the same. Trust betrayed. Again. Why do I trust anyone? Why do I believe anyone? It seems such an exercise in futility!
It begins to feel as if I cannot take a single step without someone watching. I am awfully tempted to do something rash just so there will be something worthwhile to report back. Of course, I am also tempted to go hide in my room and never again leave it, but I sincerely doubt either of those options would yeild good results.
In the meantime, I get on with things in as normal a manner as possible. It is difficult, especially when I know that they are there, but still I try.
I spent the eve with Davick. He had expressed a wish to revisit the past and I had a driving need to get out of that town and away from the watchful eyes of my various stalkers. Thus, I had him take me to the pond in the woods.
Naturally, it was not at all like it used to be for either of us. So much had changed. We spoke about what was and what is. At one point, he wrapped his arms around me as he had done so long ago; holding me so gently, as if he feared I would did he lay even the slightest pressure upon my frail-looking frame. For but a moment, it felt as if we were back in those days, back at that time, when my world consisted of no more than that place and less than a handful of people.
But there is no going back.
