A Letter



((A letter written with a neat handwriting, on a page stripped from a notebook.))

Dear Miss Waldera,

 

Today I came across a most unusual event. A creepy, dangerously thin and very sulky man called Favarth -or this is how he himself anyway- claimed to have your very hand in marriage! Could you believe that! Of course I did not believe in such a tale. This queer man, goodness knows where he finds such courage, is telling lies to everyone about you, thus lowering your esteemed reputation amongst the highest value maidens in Bree!

My dearest lady, years of experience in my profession allows me to tell you that this man is just a creep who is desperately in love with you. Of course, from afar; he might be observing you without any notice. How horrid! I suggest you draw your curtains tightly and lock your door at night!

Yet he very well knows that he does not have a single chance to reach you or to attract your attention. I am sure a lady such as yourself would not notice this lanky man in worn clothes and the most unhandsome look. I am sure he knows his limits and your high standards. He keeps gazing at you like a fool keeps gazing at the stars in clear a summer night's sky. In his utter misery, he has created himself an imaginary world where he possesses your love and loyalty. That is why he speaks about this imaginary love affair so casually as if it was truly a part of his miserable life!

My dearest sweet lady Waldera, I can tell this mad man is no reliable at all, not at all! I do have concerns about your safety. 

I advise you to warn your dear uncle about this situation and get married as soon as possible. When the queer sees you married, he will curl his tail behind his back and walk away, I am sure. This queer man also carries all sorts of knives claiming he is a surgeon! Oh, he threatened me with cutting my throat unless I assisted him in his work. And this very dangerously mad man is obsessed about you, my dear lady, please keep safe! 

Yours,

L.B.