From the journal of Isilyan: 5 - All at sea

I am torn. Since my time in the wilderness ended, I have known nothing but duty. My loyalties to my Tûr, to my Order and to The Lady have known no equal but now my thoughts are clouded. Noruihel… I fear that the fire that burns within my soul will soon consume me. My love for this maiden fills my waking day and interrupts my meditation with alarming frequency. I see her smile where ever I look, in the trees, in the flowers, in the sweet waters of streams… I cannot escape it. Though in truth I would not wish to escape, just the mention of her name of her fills me with hope. I must not succumb to this… dream. I must still undertake my duties and I would never neglect my brave Malledhrim. I cannot just suppress my feelings for Noruihel, but I must not let them rule my life. I have faced many foes, many trials, many horrors, but none have caused such anguish as this. I have much skill with a bow, but in affairs for the heart I am just a novice. I have received no training in such matters and I find myself lacking. Upon writing these words I find myself again in doubt… what of Noruihel’s feelings for me? Her shyness masks many horrors in her life that I can only begin to imagine. Does she struggle with the same demons as I or is my love for her a burden itself? I have heard her sing to Elbereth, songs of sadness and lament, though their origin and meaning are not yet clear to me. Am I the cause of her sadness? No, this cannot be – she would have made this clear to me. I have placed my trust in her, and she in me. I know that she has love for me as I do for her; what am I to do? I am sure that my friend Tinuvinil will have wise council for me, but I have not had chance to talk with him. Our duties have not allowed for us to meet of late and never before have I found myself in such need of his wisdom. Now I must return to my duties for I sense that my troops are restless. This place offers them no comfort and our mission into this wet land is our most perilous yet…