Surely, here is a picture worth painting, Parnard thought. There stood Lord Anglachelm, the noble lord of his household, crowded close around by a group of admiring elves. All were gazing in wonderment at the marvelous pendant crafted for him by Elvealin.
But I could not paint it – I have not the skill for that either! Parnard ground his teeth in frustration. Never did he feel more alone and farther away from home and friends than he did now. I suppose I have nothing to either please the eye or delight; in addition, I am unlearned, untutored, and know little of the ways of these watchers of the stars, these jewel-crafters, these weapon-smiths. Very skillful are they, and make all manner of useful and beautiful objects, but they have had years upon years to perfect their craft and knowledge, while I have accomplished naught but living; my daily thought was occupied with finding food and shelter in the Greenwood. How sad it would be if there were nothing else to do, but there is plenty in this wide world for everyone! It is said, ‘Every one hath his proper gift’, – his own talent, or virtue, and excel in some thing; perhaps I am more fit to roam wild in the woods than anything else.
I should be thankful that I do not have to contend with the evils of a proud, quarrelsome, and severe temper. I would that all were as pleasant as myself, and had absolute self-control, and could recognize their weakness of nature – then they would see that some might have other gifts that they do not have, and honour them for it. But I cannot expect these others to act as thoughtfully or patiently as myself and give a kind word when it is needed. I must bear and forbear, and try to be at peace. Now Lord Anglachelm weeps! – the tinkling pendant reminds him of his lost home. He hath borne many griefs and carries many sorrows; I should well endure mine.
I swore the Oath, and now that my name is counted among the Household, I am to receive love and respect: so sayeth my lord, but respect is given to those whom it is owed, and love is given to those whom we esteem and cherish. I will take greater care not to fall out with my brethren and earn their scorn and enmity, but without knowing how to earn their respect or love, I fear that I shall ever remain a stranger to my own house.
