Dem reached to take Em's and Syllea's hands, pausing to look at Egfor with an angry glare. He tugs the girls along, saying, "Come along, let us leave. He's hopeless."
Egfor desperately wanted to call out, run after them, to beg and plead for them to stay. He was rooted and silenced. None of them looked back or slowed down.
Egfor choked back a sob as he woke up. He glanced over, seeing it was still dark. He emits a small sigh and rolls carefully out of Dem's arms, being sure not to wake him. He tugged on a pair of trousers and shoes, not even bothering with a shirt in this heat. He crept quietly out of the bedroom, being sure not to wake any of the dogs.
He slipped outside and closed the door gently behind him. He let out a breath and stepped towards the windmill that has long since stopped milling.
The grass crunched under his soft shoes, kicking up dust as he walked. He frowns as he looks up and sees nothing but the stars and a full moon that lit his path.
Egfor pushed into the windmill, coughing slightly at the dust that roused at his presence. He made his way up the stairs onto a little balcony that looked out over his property.
He sank down to sit, the rough hewn wood digging into his bare back. Egfor hesitated before slipping off his wedding band so that his husband wouldn't be awoken by feeling Egfor's emotions through their rings.
His head thunked back against the wood, closing his eyes and letting the tears flow freely. He was expected to be happy and his cheerful self, finding masking his true feelings becoming more and more difficult.
If he hid himself, it wouldn't be received, but neither is showing his actual feelings, as he so discovered tonight. Being vulnerable in front of the girls was unacceptable. He needed to 'get his act together' as they said.
More and more he felt the urge to burn down his life and run off, like the wildfires that renew the forests every so often. Every step he took tightened a noose around his neck. No step was ever correct. Every move, word and thought was wrong. He could do nothing right, and that showed time and time again. He was too much for Dem, too much for their daughters.
If only he could properly explain why he was hesitant to show affection to their daughters without explicit permission.
Egfor shuddered and sobbed as those painful memories of his childhood and youth came back to haunt him. While his father was dead, his uncle still lived.
Egfor wretchedly spilled all the tears he had till he had no more left to spill. He slipped his wedding band back on and dizzily stumbled up to his feet.
He took a moment to steady himself before slumping back down the windmill stairs and back to bed and Dem's arms.
