I can't sleep. Tairy is out like a snuffed candle. I could spend the whole of the night just looking at him. I love the way my whole inside aches just to be looking at his face. I think it might be past midnight, but maybe not. It is raining now, and the sound is so very pleasant. Our room is tiny, and these hobbit beds are tinier still, but there's nowhere in all the world that I'd rather be.
If it is still the 14th of February, then it is still what Pa and Ma used to call Sweethearts Day. Ma said it were more to get folk thinking about the end of winter and spring coming soon, to make them happy and hopeful after all the cold, dark months. Pa said it were so men could come in early from the fields or the smithy or the shop, and spend a few extra hours kissing their wives. That always made Ma laugh and blush and give him a swat on his arm.
How I miss them both...
How I wish they could know Tairy. And know how happy I am. How safe and well and loved I am.
And that has me thinking of wishes all around. So I wanted to write a few of them down.
I wish that Tairy might know just how much I love him. Even if I can't say it or show it proper now, maybe one day I'll find a way to do it. He talks with the most beautiful words that leave me all melted and foolish inside. I think he should have been a bard or a poet if he wasn't a sailor! But I don't have the words like he does. I can say "I love you!" a thousand times over, and it still isn't enough. One day, I will find a way to show him. I wish for that.
And I wish that all folk in the world might know what love is. Real, true love. Maybe not today (not likely everyone is going to fall in love in one day, aye?), but at least once before they die. I wish that everyone would have someone that they look at, and feel all their insides aching with something that is so big and strong and mighty that it makes your eyes sting and your breath hard to catch.
So, if you're lonely on this rainy night...don't give up, aye? I didn't look for Tairy, and he didn't look for me. Something bigger than either of us brought us to each other. And we didn't try to make it happen, it happened all on its own. My Pa and Ma didn't have to try and feel that thing for one another, they just felt it. They didn't hide it or run from it, they let it...flow. It flowed from him to her, and from her to him. All the years I were growing up. When they both started to get grey in their hair and complain about aches and pains, they had the same smile for each other.
I may not know much. I may only have one good leg. I may be just a poor, farmer's girl. But I have love, and I've seen love, and you couldn't get me to give it up for all the gold and silver and jewels in all of Middle-earth. Not even for a second.
And I wish everyone in the world might have a bit of that love, too.
