Found:
I woke up this morning with quite a smile upon my lips. I woke up this morning with laughter in my mind. I woke up this morning alone, even though I had been in company when I fell asleep.
It is such a rarity for me to be the one being deserted in the middle of the night. Such a fine, ironic rarity, that I cannot help but find it entertaining. How often have I been the one to sneak from a bed, to tiptoe out of a room in the dead of night, careful not to wake the slumbering occupant of the room? How often have I been the one absent come sunrise? I can count the times it has happened to me upon one hand and still have fingers to spare! It tickles me every time.
Prior to that, I had quite a pleasant evening.
Loakee had been right when he had said that I had lost some of my old spark - and this is a man who has never seen me with it! He was right, I admit it, and so I sought to gain some of it back.
A night of singing and dancing! That would perk me up. Doesn't it always? And with Bessie's permission, the Wolf was my stage! Ah, the fun I had. The music, the song, the dancing! It's been far too long since I last did anything of that ilk and now, when I am finally beginning to reconcile myself with... myself, I found that I appreciate the lighter moments all the more.
Perhaps that is why I've enjoyed the past few days with Loakee so? He makes me laugh and even when we disagree on a subject he is amicable about it. There is no pressure there. No guilt. Just jokes, friendly teasing, and laughter.
Still, I look upon the man and wonder. I can't shake the feeling that he and I are too alike, that he is - to a lesser extent - using humour to mask his intentions and pain. I have seen glimpses of... something. Some long-buried hurt, perhaps? Or wishes unfulfilled? Perhaps I am simply imagining it, unwittingly and uncharacteristically eager to view him as a kindred spirit.
No matter! I will learn more of him in subsequent meetings. After all, I must stay in Bree-land for now even if only to hold him to that promise about the dress!
Beyond that, I will be wary.
