This is written in a fast manner and sometimes the ink is fading
Earlier, Basaran and I went to the Dawnhall, to stay away from Bree and talk business, we were there, talking about the Ripper when something made us itch and go upstairs. Maybe it was curiosity, maybe it was the fact that I haven't been up there since I put the cradle, maybe it was something else... Something cruel and cold, something painful and sad. We weren't prepared for what we found, the Captain was there... He was lying on the bed, lifeless and cold... There was blood on the sheets, but, despite that he looked calm. a sight that wasn't usual. Hardoleth would be either happy or angry in his life, almost never calm and peaceful as he was now. After checking his pulse I confirmed his death, and both Basaran and I stood there, without knowing what to do, how to react to this...
Near the bed was a small book, wrapped in leather, the man was dead, he couldn't prevent us from opening it, and we did, we had to see what was there. We were shocked to find that in that small book the man wrote his will... Apparently he was sick and dying, but in his pride he didn't want anyone to know and feel sorry for him, or even be happy for his state, but... He could ask for help... There could be a cure... We'd find it... His words in the book were truthful and coming from heart, the man knew what he did and whom he hurt in his entire life, and now in his last moments he was apologizing to them, he was being kind. Death is a strange thing... Now matter how tough you think you are, when his Scythe lies above you you will soften, you will take off that thing off your eyes and will be forced to see clearly, and speak the truth. I took the book and hid it on me, I will read it at his funeral and say some words for him as well, maybe he was a bastard in most of his life but underneath that armor he was a kind man.
At first we agreed to keep it a secret until Hyrien knew of that, she is in charge now, by right and by the Captain's words, she was to decide what would happen. Time was passing, and I had to keep my grief away from me, I knew that it would be difficult for all, someone had to stay strong for them. The third to know was Rothlung, he saw me at the Prancing Pony, drinking... As I always do later... He wanted to know what's wrong with me, I took the bottle of Hyrien's favorite, and took him to the Dawnhall, after prompting him to drink I unlocked the bedroom's door for him... At first he wanted to believe that it was a joke... But he took it harder than us two earlier, he drunk more and smashed the bottle into the room, he was broken, he always thought Hardoleth as his brother. Guiding him, showing him the right way, and now he was gone... I felt my heart pound at that moment, but I held myself, more have to know, more will break... Someone has to be there... Again, we left the Captain's body wrapped in a sheet, locked the door and returned to the office, to speak of what was to be done. The two first people I sent letters to were Neyaa and Taala... They had to know, one was what have been closest to a wife for him and had his child, and the other one was his daughter... And the came, not long after.
First appeared the Grey Warden, he returned to Bree and paid us a visit in this hard time, behind him were Neyaa and Deredan. This was harder to tell... Neyaa loved him, she always loved him, how could I tell them that Hardoleth died? Whom am I to do that? Again, as I did with Roth, I told them that something sad happened, something hard to cope with and slowly told them the news... Neyaa fell on the floor, hurt to the depth as expected, Deredan was shocked and stunned and the Grey Warden stood there, motionless and unexpressed, as is his usual way, but deep down I believe he was hurt too. I read the part of the will concerning Neyaa and branston to them, and gave her the renamed sword, the Dawnbringer to keep for Branston. After talking about him more I decided to arrange his funeral, he was dead for one day at least, we can't let his body rot, Hyrien will be pissed... They were close and I know that she would want to say a last goodbye, rather than stand on his grave, but he has to be buried soon. So, I sent messages to all Dawners, informing them of the news, just as soon as Taala came. She must have been the one who took it harder, for she acted as if she didn't care, she wanted to practice the bow... But, it was obvious that she couldn't cope with either.
The first of the Dawners to come was Nellye, it hurt me to see her there, far from me in this difficult situation but that is how the things are, we're split and I have to live with that. The second one was Ralyn, he didn't knew the Captain I think, but he came, he was his Captain as well after all. Slowly Neyaa and Deredan left, Roth was trying to comfort Tal and I was left there drinking again. Until I broke... All that drink, whiskey and ale mixed is lethal! made me break... It made me kneel and show weakness in front of them... But it must not happen again. It was a moment of weakness, too many moments of weakness lately, but I got used of being broken, never again they shall see me like that. I will be tough and strong from now on. Nel tried to support me in those moments, and she managed it quite well, despite the distance between us. Till the time had come for me to leave, I needed sleep, bath and food, his funeral is to be arranged, and new things to come. The sun is burning red above us... But now I am strong, I left all weaknesses behind!
