Green Club

Excerpts from the diary of Ann Hope, collated and separately reviewed by Matilda Moseley and John F. Summers of The Scholar’s Hall, Bree-Town. These snippets were to be published as part of a larger academic text by the duo, entitled 'Green Club: A Society Unraveled'. The only copy in existence, and all notes and diaries associated with the project, now curiously gather dust on Greengrove's bookshelf in his abode.


Green Club

First Excerpt of Diary Entry Eighty One

It really is a different way to spend an evening among friends. Every Thursday all four of us gather at Petunia’s home. Though Norman doesn’t always attend, which is a shame. Lazy bugger! Typically, he shows up when he's certain there's free tea, biscuits, and cake. Or better quality gossip! You’d think he was a hobbit! Though I suppose sightings of our mysterious friend are so few and far between, and so we make do with stories and rumours too. Nevertheless, I am glad we’ve established ‘Green Club’ for what it is. We’ve all had encounters with that strange man - if indeed that’s what he is. I'm glad we found each other. I imagine there are others like us out there. 

Only a small excerpt here of Green Club being established. I’ve put a line through what we don’t need, John. - M.M

As you will. Some interesting stuff there, though. For example, they began as a four, but we know they number greater than that later. I also underlined ‘sightings of our mysterious friend are so few and far between’. He’s not so rare a find today. I wonder what changed? – J.F.S


Second Excerpt of Diary Entry Eighty One

It seems that no encounter with so-called ‘Greengrove’ is the same. Everyone has a different tale, or even a different version of the man to meet. Norman takes it too far, though. He said his ‘Greengrove’ was part tree, sporting bark instead of flesh, with dark yellow eyes instead of the sparkling green like we all saw. Then he says there was a puff of smoke, and ‘Greengrove’ vanished the moment he was seen! Norman’s probably just trying to fit in, or justify his helpings to our food with wild imaginings, I expect.

Like Ann, I doubt this is true, but I’ll resist the urge to strike through it. We’ve heard before that there might be more than one ‘Greengrove’. In most early accounts, he makes quick exits the second he's glimpsed, too. There might be something in it, but probably not. Either way, stay your hand too, Summers! - M.M

Ann’s probably right in that Norman’s making it up. I don’t know what to believe anymore either, though. – J.F.S


Third Excerpt of Diary Entry Eighty One

Petunia said she saw ‘Greengrove’ over by Starmere Lake in the company of creatures that neither she, nor likely anyone else, had ever seen before. She said they were tall, four-legged, and had mossy backs from which many flowers and herbs sprouted. Bodies of bark, too! Was there a link to what Norman rambled about? Apparently, the creatures made a clicking sort of noise. Petunia said that ‘Greengrove’ chatted to the creatures, then walked into the Wildwood with them, though maintained some distance. Again, we had a hard time envisioning that for ourselves, but she’s our host, so we politely nodded. She also said she ran the opposite way out of fright, which is like her. We all probably sounded crazy to each other, in the end.

We’ve seen mention of these mysterious creatures before in relation to ‘Greengrove’. Noting them again! – M.M

I find the 'maintained some distance' part interesting. I take that to mean more than is usual. If this is true, then whatever these things are perhaps aren't too friendly with our man. – J.F.S


Fourth Excerpt of Diary Entry Eighty One

Fred said he was having a picnic in Chetwood when he met ‘Greengrove’. Oh Fred is ever so handsome. If I was a few years younger, I’d show him a thing or two! Anyway, there he was having his picnic beside a great big tree, when suddenly there came rustling in the branches above. Fred looks up, and there’s 'Greengrove' upon high, laughing and waving down merrily. All dressed up in his flowers, sat on a branch, as bold as you like! Yelping, Fred looked down to arm himself with a butter knife (Fred isn’t the brightest, but his looks make up for that), but when he looked back up the tree, the figure had gone. Just like that! No trace! Miraculous! I, for one, trust Fred, for reasons completely unrelated to his attractive body personality.

That last crossed out word was Ann's, for the record. Still, another quick escape. Wonder how he does it? If indeed he does. - M.M

Maybe one day we can ask him. Then again, I don’t want to disappear like all the Green Club members. We should have used pseudonyms for this... – J.F.S


Fifth Excerpt of Diary Entry Eighty One

Then it’s my turn to talk strange tall green men. I did try to. Really, I did. But words failed me. Fortunately, my fellow Green Club members understood, and we agreed I might try to share my meeting with ‘Greengrove’ upon the next meet, if I was comfortable. So instead, we spoke of other things; families, walking plans, and other gossip.

Rather anticlimactic. Get your notes and annotations back to me by tomorrow, John, and I'll look over them. After that, it's onto further entries! – M.M