Rellas came to me a few days ago, troubled by something that had occured. Naturally, I questioned the weight upon his shoulders, seeking to offer what comfort and support I could to a friend in need. I almost wish that I had not. The story he told was... disturbing to say the least.
In his quest to gain the trust of Nalokha, he had chosen to make what he considered a "sacrifice." I could barely contain my revulsion when he spoke of the ritual she had demanded. Had he any regard for her at all, I would have understood and perhaps found some joy for them - hoping that they might together encourage the good in each to blossom. This act though, so intimate and personal, was comitted in hatred. It is a perversion of what should be. I suppose I should be happy that he could not desecrate it further by striking her down in her vulnerability, as he had planned, but I have difficulty feeling anything but nausea if I turn my mind to the matter. How could be he so blind as to not see that this part of him, freely given as it was, cannot be taken back now? How could he not realise that she now owns a part of him and thus holds a power over him that she had never possessed before? This Dragon's Bargain - a full womb for her in return for a cessation of any contact with me - has me deeply worried.
Given my proior promised to protect him, I proposed a Dragon's Bargain of my own. I was hesitant to do so; such a thing is a last resort only, but this is the time for last resorts, I fear. Rellas, as I knew he would, agreed as soon as the words left my lips. I sent him away. What else could I do? It was no light thing I had suggested. He is often brash, acting without thought for the consequences and I could not allow his impulsiveness to sway his actions this time. The thing I had suggested is no light-hearted matter and I would not have him go into it blindly or without due thought. He returned to me some days later, promising that he had considered the matter properly. His mind was unchanged. If anything, he seemed more certain that this was the correct course of action whereas I had become ever more unsure. I was, however, certain that this was the last thing I could do for him; there is naught stronger that I am aware of, His heart was set and my oath was long since given, so with some reluctance I entered into this pact with him.
The ritual itself is short and simple. I recall watching others amongst the Hillman Shamans enact it with such pomp and ceremony, spending all night on something that really only takes a few hours. I have never been one for such theatrics however, thus it did not take long to have our blood mixed with the various herbs in order to make the ink. The longest part of the ritual, of course, lies in etching the tattoo into the skin of one another, but even with the frequent attempts to interrupt from the supremely beligerant Aakusti, we were done long before morning. We are bound now, Rellas and I; a piece of my spirit resides with his and his with mine. The practical advantage, of course, is that now Nalokha must face both of us together, even when we are physically at a distance.
I am certain that Cyfier would not approve of my spiritual joining with another man, but I have seen no purpose in mentioning this to him. My love is of a very practical mind, thus does not believe in the more unseen aspects of my faith. Perhaps this would be nothing to him; a meaningless nonsense. I tend to remain quiet on this subject in his presence. He knows, I think, that I indulge in such things, or suspects at least, but he never asks and I do not tell. He is gone for the moment anyway; departed on some business matter. I miss him dearly and cannot help but chastise myself for not having told him of our growing child whilst he was still here. Upon his return, I shall be certain to inform him of his impending fatherhood. May that be soon; I do not wish to be without him for longer than is necessary.
